Monday, October 6, 2008

Personal

It said something about zombies.
Something about a zombie plan but it was buried in a long list meant to scare off any potential spamming or stalking, maybe a real person sat at the other side typing each entry on the list and then submitting it to craigslist, either way I bit.
I was alone, burning some kind of midnight oil in Lake City. Away from the action and life of the city, in the outer limits of Seattle drinking cheap beers then watching someone get tattooed meant a Friday well spent. Walking past the crumbling facades of the main drag, car dealerships closed for the night, down steep hills to my house but not before buying a few Steel Reserves from the Shell on the corner. The late night cashier joking with me about buying 4 and planning a busy night. Laughing trying to convince myself I wasn’t ready to venture into Rick’s. Pay to see some boobs and have some girl feign interest but looking for a tip. Instead I held out hope that I could find someone for free.
No dice at that point.

I was too young for the girls that go for a guy renting a room and out of work. Hunting for jobs but being too picky for most. Barely talking to people but trying to be around them. Hoping after hope my phone would ring and things would turn around and something would change. Or an offer would be in my inbox and suddenly I’d have somewhere to go that wasn’t the library, bar or coffee shop. Ignoring the looks of people that wondering what I was because I couldn’t be homeless and being in the wrong place to be rich. Maybe a student? Who else would need the coffee and the library?
Yeah that kind of woman was still a decade or two off for me drinking cheap wine ‘til dawn and finding solace in being together back then I had to settle for being alone.

On craigslist personals I saw the ad and responded. By then it was just like looking for a job or getting a dresser. Give some details, interest, and send it off. Hope there’s a person on the other side and wait.
Always waiting.
Eating gyros and looking at model trains. Anything to waste time before I headed home to find an empty inbox and then it was too late to make calls or maybe there were no new jobs to be had. Watch tv and wait. Look busy and cook up some dinner and catch the news.
Act like I wasn’t out of work and bored, questioning my choice. Wondering was someone interested in my zombie plan instead of posting for a late night amusement some last laugh before bed.Either way I drank my beer, watched the news rebroadcast and went to bed.
I never got a response.