Tonight another blockbuster opened at midnight it’s happening with such frequency these summers that it’s a cliché by now. This used to be special or different. The kind of time for films to be strange and different with crowds that reflected that but I guess times change.
I used to watch Elvira and went to Rocky on occasion but was never that big in it. Now in Seattle I see the listings at the Egyptian and find myself down there on occasion and that feels right. When I lined up for the ‘Two Towers’ or ‘Attack of the Clones’ it wasn’t the same, there was no edge or subversion in that experience. We were there for the movie instead of movie being secondary to the experience that has grown around it.
In college dragging a friend to ‘Rocky’ on the green behind Corbett, midnight sometime in October my Freshman Sophmore year, my friend was the Don Quixote to my Sancho Panza but he knew next to nothing of ‘Rocky’ beside the lingerie clad girls that night around campus. Back at my room I explained some of it to him and told him about the fun it could be.
Nothing better to do and sitting around Regents without a goal for the Friday he agreed. My roommate stayed. Pouring Jim Beam into coke bottles and in trench coats we headed off to Corbett.
We hung to the back since Don was a bit nervous of the crowd. Outside of his element he didn’t know how to deal. This wasn’t the dark streets with us just wandering but a crowd dressed in a sexy but not really seen way at our college. Not wanting to miss out I dragged him closer. Around the outskirts we’d pass people. Seeing a group with a guy from my dorm in a prom dress I pulled D. Quixote closer. Flamboyantly gay princess welcomed us into the circle.
It was random conversations with them but they knew ‘Rocky’ as I offered some of my coke and we talked about times we’d been, they offered a joint. Them in lingerie and drag looking more the part and Q and me in coats against the slight New Mexico chill. More Columbine than Fredicks but it was still a ‘Rocky’ so it worked. One, a vocal laughing blonde, suggested the Don should have gone as a tranny and we laughed at him in make up and a teddy. He was embarrassed, wandered off for more coke. They all said I should have been Eddy being a bit over weight with large hair but one said ‘Riff’ looked at my eyes and the way I kind of followed but was in charge. She was burnette and smiled infrequently in her leather maid and fishenet get up. Taking a long drag she passed it to me smiling.
Taking my turn I said, ‘Then I’d get a dance with you’ and passed it on.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Winter
I think it was Jon that said it standing in front of the Lickety Splitz in Bellflower. Pair of girls walked into a liquor store, near our age but classier in the starting winter chill of Southern California. Warm day turned into cool night so the long coats over mini skirts more fashion than function.
‘I like girls that swish’ he said as they piled into the car and drove into the night. Both of us left to wait and wonder. Nothing for us but to stand around with no plan or goal for the evening, give up and head our separate ways to repeat the night a few more times before I left. Stellar end to a stellar week.
Hurrying to my bus in Seattle I’m reminded of that saying. Almost midnight on a Friday near Downtown, a long day at two jobs, covered in glitter, grim and grief. Waiting to get home and put the last 14 hours of various bosses, double standards and box pushing behind me. Drink a beer, watch some cable and try to make a weekend out of it. Ignore the cabs dropping off well dressed sophistos, hipsters and the past 30 set trying to hold onto the illusion of youth. Dressed to the nines in either too much or too little, stumbling down uneven streets to some poorly lit bar that traded in more ambiance than alcohol. Dark but never dank which is what I wanted at that moment a place to lose the past day.
Past a young man too gone with exhaustion to care wanting to be home, peel off his workman blacks and get to bed.
I envied them. But had that vague feeling I couldn’t go into their world. Something kept me out of it.
Maybe it was the faded blacks, the tool bag or the glitter that looked like I lost a fight with an elf. Either way they passed by with only dirty looks as I waited for my bus.
‘Does this bus go to Ballard?’ it was soft and sweet breaking me out of the funk that was brewing. I looked over. She was even less prepared for the winter than me. Wearing shorts and chucks, shivering under a long crocheted (or knitted) sweater, ‘Yeah should be here soon I think… not sure really’ she asks if I had a long day and I laugh admitting it didn’t seem that way at first. She smiles looking somehow out of place from the Friday crowd just a little detail betraying the whole. I ask what brought her to Seattle and she tells me about her friends and family. Mentioned a brief description of places far away as I waver between awake and asleep nearly forgetting her name as the 15 pulls up.
She climbs up, hesitates, pays and sits down. The bus is half a block away before I realize it was yet another chance I missed.
‘I like girls that swish’ he said as they piled into the car and drove into the night. Both of us left to wait and wonder. Nothing for us but to stand around with no plan or goal for the evening, give up and head our separate ways to repeat the night a few more times before I left. Stellar end to a stellar week.
Hurrying to my bus in Seattle I’m reminded of that saying. Almost midnight on a Friday near Downtown, a long day at two jobs, covered in glitter, grim and grief. Waiting to get home and put the last 14 hours of various bosses, double standards and box pushing behind me. Drink a beer, watch some cable and try to make a weekend out of it. Ignore the cabs dropping off well dressed sophistos, hipsters and the past 30 set trying to hold onto the illusion of youth. Dressed to the nines in either too much or too little, stumbling down uneven streets to some poorly lit bar that traded in more ambiance than alcohol. Dark but never dank which is what I wanted at that moment a place to lose the past day.
Past a young man too gone with exhaustion to care wanting to be home, peel off his workman blacks and get to bed.
I envied them. But had that vague feeling I couldn’t go into their world. Something kept me out of it.
Maybe it was the faded blacks, the tool bag or the glitter that looked like I lost a fight with an elf. Either way they passed by with only dirty looks as I waited for my bus.
‘Does this bus go to Ballard?’ it was soft and sweet breaking me out of the funk that was brewing. I looked over. She was even less prepared for the winter than me. Wearing shorts and chucks, shivering under a long crocheted (or knitted) sweater, ‘Yeah should be here soon I think… not sure really’ she asks if I had a long day and I laugh admitting it didn’t seem that way at first. She smiles looking somehow out of place from the Friday crowd just a little detail betraying the whole. I ask what brought her to Seattle and she tells me about her friends and family. Mentioned a brief description of places far away as I waver between awake and asleep nearly forgetting her name as the 15 pulls up.
She climbs up, hesitates, pays and sits down. The bus is half a block away before I realize it was yet another chance I missed.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
The Doppelganger on the 91
It was July, boiling and no relief came from the cool breeze of the Pacific. Half awake sprawled on the double sideways seat near the rear doors of the number 91. My fedora mostly covering my eyes, my back pack as a pillow and a Hawaiian shirt toping off the outfit in a kind of mocking cool, I didn’t believe I looked good just different. After all that’s what mattered more. Not being some cookie cutter clone of a carbon image but trying for something individual.
In other words I had the look and feel of a classic dweed trying to be cool but nonchalant about it.
Didn’t really matter because at summer school. We couldn’t really be cool because there was no one to impress, just a handful of facts to be memorized and part of our freedom taken away.
That ride was my meditation. Through the kids going to the beach, or the adults going to and from work and all the rejects of other schools riding home I’d lay there listening to the road. Putting the few facts I stumbled on that day into order. Forgetting the host of people having a better time than me. The others that weren’t shackled to the bus but rather librated to go or come as they please.
In whatever form that came I’d wait out the ride and eventually get home. Disappear or hang out. It didn’t matter this was my last summer before adulthood and I tried to take some kind of advantage of it. If nothing else there was that MUD I had just found.
Then I came in.
I stopped and looked down at myself.
Electricity was in the air as I looked into my own eyes thick glasses in front of the same black brown eyes, mouths agape each of us looking for the words.
Here I way laying there I, or he, was staring down at me. We were the same but different. A different set of choices put him in a t-shirt and jeans and me in my poser cool garb. Both uncaring but for different reasons neither really confident or I don’t think he was as confident as I tried to be. I wanted to know what made him him and me me. What was the major difference but I got scared and couldn’t ask.
The bus jerked forward and he walked the couple steps to sit in the back.
I felt his eyes for the next few stops until I couldn’t take it and had to get off. I knew I fucked up but I couldn’t phrase the words right.
Couldn’t think the right way to say I knew it was me but also no me. Knew we were alike but different and that’s what haunted me. Was it just superficial or was there something more there?
Wandering over to Clark I tried to figure how the conversation would have gone. Did he have any better idea what was going on than I did or was he too trying to find that balance that I hoped existed. Did he have high hopes for the future or was it just me.
Did he have a girlfriend?
A part of me figured he must have known the answer because I didn’t.
Today over a decade after that event I still feel his wake. Coming from people who swear they know me but I figure they know him. Claiming I worked on shows that I wasn’t around for or couldn’t have done in places I’ve never heard of. Maybe if I try hard enough and go enough places I will run into him again. This time I’d like to be the cool one and him the dweeb.
In other words I had the look and feel of a classic dweed trying to be cool but nonchalant about it.
Didn’t really matter because at summer school. We couldn’t really be cool because there was no one to impress, just a handful of facts to be memorized and part of our freedom taken away.
That ride was my meditation. Through the kids going to the beach, or the adults going to and from work and all the rejects of other schools riding home I’d lay there listening to the road. Putting the few facts I stumbled on that day into order. Forgetting the host of people having a better time than me. The others that weren’t shackled to the bus but rather librated to go or come as they please.
In whatever form that came I’d wait out the ride and eventually get home. Disappear or hang out. It didn’t matter this was my last summer before adulthood and I tried to take some kind of advantage of it. If nothing else there was that MUD I had just found.
Then I came in.
I stopped and looked down at myself.
Electricity was in the air as I looked into my own eyes thick glasses in front of the same black brown eyes, mouths agape each of us looking for the words.
Here I way laying there I, or he, was staring down at me. We were the same but different. A different set of choices put him in a t-shirt and jeans and me in my poser cool garb. Both uncaring but for different reasons neither really confident or I don’t think he was as confident as I tried to be. I wanted to know what made him him and me me. What was the major difference but I got scared and couldn’t ask.
The bus jerked forward and he walked the couple steps to sit in the back.
I felt his eyes for the next few stops until I couldn’t take it and had to get off. I knew I fucked up but I couldn’t phrase the words right.
Couldn’t think the right way to say I knew it was me but also no me. Knew we were alike but different and that’s what haunted me. Was it just superficial or was there something more there?
Wandering over to Clark I tried to figure how the conversation would have gone. Did he have any better idea what was going on than I did or was he too trying to find that balance that I hoped existed. Did he have high hopes for the future or was it just me.
Did he have a girlfriend?
A part of me figured he must have known the answer because I didn’t.
Today over a decade after that event I still feel his wake. Coming from people who swear they know me but I figure they know him. Claiming I worked on shows that I wasn’t around for or couldn’t have done in places I’ve never heard of. Maybe if I try hard enough and go enough places I will run into him again. This time I’d like to be the cool one and him the dweeb.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
25 things or how I learned to stop worrying and make a contribution to a (facebook) meme.
If everyone jumped off a bridge I wouldn’t be one of the first to jump. Rather hang around for a bit, see how it’s going and weigh my chances for survival.
Wonder how good they are?
Here’s my contribution to this 25 Facebook meme.
1. I am near blind without glasses or contacts. Perhaps not meeting the legal definition of the condition but enough to make me feel like Velma when I wake and knock my glasses off the night stand. My relationship with nearsightedness began in 4th grade, when I also had braces.
2. I’m a middle child, pisces and a bit introverted. It’s good to make excuses for lapses in my personality and social awkwardness even if I don’t really believe it.
3. Yes I was the archetypal nerd for quite some time. In fact there is a picture of me in math club wearing a florescent green shirt, my thick glasses and wild hair. Where that kid went I have no idea but I do catch glimpses of him once in a while.
4. Probably the worst show I was ever a part of was ‘Romeo and Juliet’ during college. It was a waste of time and wish I hadn’t lit it.
5. My two best friends are a 56 year old ex DJ, sorry I mean on air personality, and I girl I dated for nearly 2 years. They are people I’m very close to and feel I can tell nearly anything to without overly harsh judgment.
6. I’m not a night or morning person. In fact if I had to classify myself I’d say I was some sort of late morning or afternoon person.
7. In Seattle people think I’m Italian or Greek. In Los Angeles it was Mexican. In Las Cruces New Mexico it was white. My mixed blood makes me passable as a lot of things.
8. You know that joke about 7 Eating 9? It’s still pretty lame.
9. Despite that fact I only own 2 black overcoats (a single breasted wool car coat and a trench coat) people tend to remember the black trench coat.
10. My freshman year of college I didn’t own a tv and watched the same three movies over and over again. (A Clockwork Orange, The Adventures of Baron Munchausen, and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas)
11. I haven’t had a nickname that stuck but I did have a song about how I could drink a bowl of rum during one of the shows I worked.
a. I do have a familial name which is Chava which is apparently a shortened form of Salvador. I’ve met a couple Chavas or Salvadors that also had this experience it’s not just my crazy parents.
12. There are some words/phrases I enjoy because I like the way they sound as well as marking my speech/ writing with a touch of… class, eloquence, confusion?
13. I’m lucky. Not in a win the lottery or I always come out on top way but in a things turn out for the best for me and I can trust that things will work out for me.
14. There are jobs I would like just to have the uniform or some part of the uniform. Lately I’ve noticed the valets and door men at many of the nice hotels in Downtown Seattle have rather nice winter overcoats and I contemplate a temporary winter time career change.
15. I refer to people that work 9-5 weekday jobs as ‘Normals’ but there is a hint of jealousy in my voice. It’s a life I don’t like and feel like an outsider doing but there’s something more comfortable about it.
16. Over thinking things is a somewhat a hobby of mine. I could easily stop this if I were wrong all the time but, alas, I’m occasionally right and in ways that take strange leaps of logic or just overcomplicate things. (like this stupid meme)
17. I blog but it’s short stories that based on life, lists, and other random things. For more personal information I write it in the journal, diary, log I’ve kept for the past 2 or 3 years.
18. When I work with someone long enough I can start to figure out how they think and begin to anticipate their thoughts/ needs. Kind of makes me feel like Radar from MASH.
19. College seems like a long time ago. High School feels like another life and everything before that I’m not entirely sure happened. Memory is such a fickle thing that I’m not 100 percent about somethings.
20. I’m more curious than people would expect at first. In fact I tend to learn about people and places I come into contact with because I want to know more about them. Some of these (in the case of people) is through overt questioning and others is through study, observation (in the case of places) research.
21. I like using parentheses in my writing to throw in comments about what I’m writing. These tend to be a bit self deprecating but still humorous.
22. There’s this painting by Norman Rockwell of a dapper older man staring at a Pollack style modern art painting (The Connoisseur)My first reaction is that that guy doesn’t see the art as art but merely paint thrown on canvas. Then I wonder if he in fact sees something in that painting that I’m missing. Then I start to wonder about post modern thought. Just sharing.
23. I used to spend 6 months of the year hanging out, talking to people and maybe running a show or two. If the pay was higher and the people cooler I’d still be there. But am still glad I left that job.
24. I own a lot of pin back buttons and penguin plushes but didn’t buy that many of them
25. I have this knack for finding things. It’s probably related to the curiosity but I can usually locate something that is lost. It’s not clairvoyance but the ability to spot something. Probably related to luck.
Wonder how good they are?
Here’s my contribution to this 25 Facebook meme.
1. I am near blind without glasses or contacts. Perhaps not meeting the legal definition of the condition but enough to make me feel like Velma when I wake and knock my glasses off the night stand. My relationship with nearsightedness began in 4th grade, when I also had braces.
2. I’m a middle child, pisces and a bit introverted. It’s good to make excuses for lapses in my personality and social awkwardness even if I don’t really believe it.
3. Yes I was the archetypal nerd for quite some time. In fact there is a picture of me in math club wearing a florescent green shirt, my thick glasses and wild hair. Where that kid went I have no idea but I do catch glimpses of him once in a while.
4. Probably the worst show I was ever a part of was ‘Romeo and Juliet’ during college. It was a waste of time and wish I hadn’t lit it.
5. My two best friends are a 56 year old ex DJ, sorry I mean on air personality, and I girl I dated for nearly 2 years. They are people I’m very close to and feel I can tell nearly anything to without overly harsh judgment.
6. I’m not a night or morning person. In fact if I had to classify myself I’d say I was some sort of late morning or afternoon person.
7. In Seattle people think I’m Italian or Greek. In Los Angeles it was Mexican. In Las Cruces New Mexico it was white. My mixed blood makes me passable as a lot of things.
8. You know that joke about 7 Eating 9? It’s still pretty lame.
9. Despite that fact I only own 2 black overcoats (a single breasted wool car coat and a trench coat) people tend to remember the black trench coat.
10. My freshman year of college I didn’t own a tv and watched the same three movies over and over again. (A Clockwork Orange, The Adventures of Baron Munchausen, and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas)
11. I haven’t had a nickname that stuck but I did have a song about how I could drink a bowl of rum during one of the shows I worked.
a. I do have a familial name which is Chava which is apparently a shortened form of Salvador. I’ve met a couple Chavas or Salvadors that also had this experience it’s not just my crazy parents.
12. There are some words/phrases I enjoy because I like the way they sound as well as marking my speech/ writing with a touch of… class, eloquence, confusion?
13. I’m lucky. Not in a win the lottery or I always come out on top way but in a things turn out for the best for me and I can trust that things will work out for me.
14. There are jobs I would like just to have the uniform or some part of the uniform. Lately I’ve noticed the valets and door men at many of the nice hotels in Downtown Seattle have rather nice winter overcoats and I contemplate a temporary winter time career change.
15. I refer to people that work 9-5 weekday jobs as ‘Normals’ but there is a hint of jealousy in my voice. It’s a life I don’t like and feel like an outsider doing but there’s something more comfortable about it.
16. Over thinking things is a somewhat a hobby of mine. I could easily stop this if I were wrong all the time but, alas, I’m occasionally right and in ways that take strange leaps of logic or just overcomplicate things. (like this stupid meme)
17. I blog but it’s short stories that based on life, lists, and other random things. For more personal information I write it in the journal, diary, log I’ve kept for the past 2 or 3 years.
18. When I work with someone long enough I can start to figure out how they think and begin to anticipate their thoughts/ needs. Kind of makes me feel like Radar from MASH.
19. College seems like a long time ago. High School feels like another life and everything before that I’m not entirely sure happened. Memory is such a fickle thing that I’m not 100 percent about somethings.
20. I’m more curious than people would expect at first. In fact I tend to learn about people and places I come into contact with because I want to know more about them. Some of these (in the case of people) is through overt questioning and others is through study, observation (in the case of places) research.
21. I like using parentheses in my writing to throw in comments about what I’m writing. These tend to be a bit self deprecating but still humorous.
22. There’s this painting by Norman Rockwell of a dapper older man staring at a Pollack style modern art painting (The Connoisseur)My first reaction is that that guy doesn’t see the art as art but merely paint thrown on canvas. Then I wonder if he in fact sees something in that painting that I’m missing. Then I start to wonder about post modern thought. Just sharing.
23. I used to spend 6 months of the year hanging out, talking to people and maybe running a show or two. If the pay was higher and the people cooler I’d still be there. But am still glad I left that job.
24. I own a lot of pin back buttons and penguin plushes but didn’t buy that many of them
25. I have this knack for finding things. It’s probably related to the curiosity but I can usually locate something that is lost. It’s not clairvoyance but the ability to spot something. Probably related to luck.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Personal
It said something about zombies.
Something about a zombie plan but it was buried in a long list meant to scare off any potential spamming or stalking, maybe a real person sat at the other side typing each entry on the list and then submitting it to craigslist, either way I bit.
I was alone, burning some kind of midnight oil in Lake City. Away from the action and life of the city, in the outer limits of Seattle drinking cheap beers then watching someone get tattooed meant a Friday well spent. Walking past the crumbling facades of the main drag, car dealerships closed for the night, down steep hills to my house but not before buying a few Steel Reserves from the Shell on the corner. The late night cashier joking with me about buying 4 and planning a busy night. Laughing trying to convince myself I wasn’t ready to venture into Rick’s. Pay to see some boobs and have some girl feign interest but looking for a tip. Instead I held out hope that I could find someone for free.
No dice at that point.
I was too young for the girls that go for a guy renting a room and out of work. Hunting for jobs but being too picky for most. Barely talking to people but trying to be around them. Hoping after hope my phone would ring and things would turn around and something would change. Or an offer would be in my inbox and suddenly I’d have somewhere to go that wasn’t the library, bar or coffee shop. Ignoring the looks of people that wondering what I was because I couldn’t be homeless and being in the wrong place to be rich. Maybe a student? Who else would need the coffee and the library?
Yeah that kind of woman was still a decade or two off for me drinking cheap wine ‘til dawn and finding solace in being together back then I had to settle for being alone.
On craigslist personals I saw the ad and responded. By then it was just like looking for a job or getting a dresser. Give some details, interest, and send it off. Hope there’s a person on the other side and wait.
Always waiting.
Eating gyros and looking at model trains. Anything to waste time before I headed home to find an empty inbox and then it was too late to make calls or maybe there were no new jobs to be had. Watch tv and wait. Look busy and cook up some dinner and catch the news.
Act like I wasn’t out of work and bored, questioning my choice. Wondering was someone interested in my zombie plan instead of posting for a late night amusement some last laugh before bed.Either way I drank my beer, watched the news rebroadcast and went to bed.
I never got a response.
Something about a zombie plan but it was buried in a long list meant to scare off any potential spamming or stalking, maybe a real person sat at the other side typing each entry on the list and then submitting it to craigslist, either way I bit.
I was alone, burning some kind of midnight oil in Lake City. Away from the action and life of the city, in the outer limits of Seattle drinking cheap beers then watching someone get tattooed meant a Friday well spent. Walking past the crumbling facades of the main drag, car dealerships closed for the night, down steep hills to my house but not before buying a few Steel Reserves from the Shell on the corner. The late night cashier joking with me about buying 4 and planning a busy night. Laughing trying to convince myself I wasn’t ready to venture into Rick’s. Pay to see some boobs and have some girl feign interest but looking for a tip. Instead I held out hope that I could find someone for free.
No dice at that point.
I was too young for the girls that go for a guy renting a room and out of work. Hunting for jobs but being too picky for most. Barely talking to people but trying to be around them. Hoping after hope my phone would ring and things would turn around and something would change. Or an offer would be in my inbox and suddenly I’d have somewhere to go that wasn’t the library, bar or coffee shop. Ignoring the looks of people that wondering what I was because I couldn’t be homeless and being in the wrong place to be rich. Maybe a student? Who else would need the coffee and the library?
Yeah that kind of woman was still a decade or two off for me drinking cheap wine ‘til dawn and finding solace in being together back then I had to settle for being alone.
On craigslist personals I saw the ad and responded. By then it was just like looking for a job or getting a dresser. Give some details, interest, and send it off. Hope there’s a person on the other side and wait.
Always waiting.
Eating gyros and looking at model trains. Anything to waste time before I headed home to find an empty inbox and then it was too late to make calls or maybe there were no new jobs to be had. Watch tv and wait. Look busy and cook up some dinner and catch the news.
Act like I wasn’t out of work and bored, questioning my choice. Wondering was someone interested in my zombie plan instead of posting for a late night amusement some last laugh before bed.Either way I drank my beer, watched the news rebroadcast and went to bed.
I never got a response.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Dead Hours: Of Popcorn and Beer
During the dead hours I don’t make the best culinary choices. Few options and prevalence of 24 hour diners or drive thrus just aren’t what they should be. How many times can I ask for 24 hour sushi and be denied (too many I say). Still little has changed as I speed from one distant city to my bed. It reminds me of the month of October.
Years past standing in the lot after being told, ‘Get the Fuck out of here/Finish up that beer’ by the Tom Kat. Few choices in the Anaheim/Buena Park area beside Denny’s and a handfulla of drive thrus. Beats going home where there is nothing but co(r)ntainers of food left from Haunt dinner.
Not the choice for someone watching there figure or BAC but I made do.
Maybe a taco or jumbo jack, feeling rich (not Rich Watson rich) there’s Carl’s and a 6 dollar burger. (Guac with season fries and mix some rum in the coke)
In
The choices a bit lessened and a bit better. Not so much recycled grease and late night diner, maybe the late night special and a beer. Finish the night how it started and in some bars a better thing drinking beers above my wage and eating food out of my range except during the late night specials sure it’s usually Fish and Chips but there are other places with other choices.
Then again ending up at home finishing the last of a 6 pack and watching ‘Clerks 2’ I eat some popcorn.
Or cheese. Or both.
Whatever the fridge holds and usually it’s the insight that I live near a few stores but don’t frequent them enough. Tough place to be when money isn’t short and your soles haven’t run thin. Laziness and the ever present busy brings me to drink cheap 7-11 beer and eat popcorn. It’s not the late night tacos consumed in the kitchen of a Man house while listening to what I missed or sitting in an empty pool feeling like a movie from the 90s, making sense but not funded properly having candy from a liquor store still open despite the hour. Even if it was a toy candy lollipop bought for the brief amusement it’d bring.
Yeah all that made the dead hours more tolerable but in the end the choices aren’t what they should be. After all why can’t I buy teriyaki at 3 in the morning? (cause it’d hit the spot right now, seriously)
But those are the dead hours.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
[Thirty-nine secrets about yourself]
[One] What is your natural hair color?
Dark Brown but lately I’ve been noticing some grey in it. I’m getting older and I’m not sure if that’s cool. Still have all my hair but getting older does present some problems. But if I’m getting older why am I still carded? Damn this baby face.
[Two] Where was your default picture taken?
Anjuné’s couch… I think. In fact I almost changed it just to spite her.
[Three] What's your middle name?
Benjamin
[Four] Your current relationship status?
odd at best
[Five] Does your crush like you back?
I think so, I’m not too sure. It feels like it but I don’t really know for sure.
[Six] What is your current mood?
Introspective going on drunk…well tipsy… not because of the introspective part but because I feel like it… I think. Jeez Can I try saying that without seeming like I have a substance abuse problem. I almost put I had a stressful week and that reads like something out of an AA handbook.
[Seven] What color underwear are you wearing?
Green I think, they might be blue… now I’m curious. Hang on a second. Nope Black.
I was way off
[Eight] What makes you happy?
When I make someone laugh, kind of lame, (admitted) but still it makes me feel good.
[Ten] If you could go back in time and change something, what would you change?
I alter the course of history and restore question 9 . A lame use of power I admit but I think it might be worth it. Instead I shall invent a 9
[Sal’s Nine] If you had to live without water or love which would it be?
Man could you take the Kelly Link out of the bathroom already. I realize ‘Water off a Black Dog’s Back’ is a good story but give it up. Put something else in there. I got an idea put the ‘Bukowski Reader’ in there then you can read about his life.
Dickass.
[Eleven] If you must be an animal for one day, what would you be?
Sloth? Yeah why not but like a more active sloth… or maybe a giant sloth I mean I’d be extinct but they were giant and sloth like. Regular Sloths are kind of cool in they’re own lazy way even if they don’t make use of those claws.
[Twelve] Ever had a near death experience?
I had an experience where I thought I should have a near death experience. I was changing some lighting stuff and had a pipe resting against the lift I was in, 20 feet in the air, and all the weight is against my lift’s bucket as I remove the shackle holding it to a rig point. At that moment I realize it’d be a great moment for me to have a near death experience.
But I didn’t.
[Thirteen] Was it because of something you do a lot?
No but I started wondering when I began taking risks like that.
[Fourteen] What's the name of the song stuck in your head right now?
The Gambler or Ana Ng but I’m going to say the Gambler to not be all nerd rock.
[Fifteen] Who did you copy and paste this from?
Anjuné
[Sixteen] Name someone with the same birthday as you?
Taisha we’re birthday buddies.
[Seventeen] When was the last time you cried?
I don’t know, a while ago.
[Eighteen] Have you ever sung in front of a large audience?
Yes, I played Nachum the beggar in DALO’s production of Fiddler on the Roof in Las Cruces, NM. That was back in ’03 I think. Nothing like being cast by the director asking if you wanted to be an inn keeper, book seller or beggar, what else can I do but choose the beggar.
[Nineteen] If you could have one super power what would it be?
Telepathy or this new one I proposed to my friend Bob which was the ability to affect probability.
[Twenty] What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Literally the first thing would be if they have all their arms and legs yeah after that it boils down to some other physical feature depending on how close I am. Vague yeah but I don’t want to admit that I judge people on superficial features and would rather say something like ‘eyes’ or ‘smile’ but I don’t know if that’s true each person in a new story… also hair color I notice that pretty fair up the list.
[Twenty-one] What do you usually order from starbucks?
Grande drip no room. On the rare occasion I feel experimental grande drip no room with a shot or four could be a shot in the dark, a red eye or something else like that but it’s the same kind of thing.
[Twenty-two] What's your biggest secret?
I’m not as calm and together as I’d like to believe I am.
[Twenty-three] Favorite color?
Green. Has been since I was a kid will be forever unless I get hit in the head, become color blind and forget what colors look like then I’ll say grey.
[Twenty-four] When was the last time you lied?
Today, don’t ask me what it was but I’m sure I lied today even if it was along the lines of ‘that’s not possible’ which was actually ‘I can’t do that in that amount of time’
[Twenty-five] Do you still watch kiddy movies or TV shows?
Duh, Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends is kick ass.
[Twenty-six] What are you eating or drinking at the moment?
Black Boss Porter, it is also kick ass.
[Twenty-seven] Do you speak any other language?
no but I know a few expression in Spanish
[Twenty-eight] What's your favorite smell?
Baking bread or the smell of salt water, put’em together and it’s awesome.
[Twenty-nine] If you could describe your life in one word what would it be?
Zen
[Thirty] When was the last time you gave/received a hug?
Last weekend.
[Thirty-one] Have you ever been kissed in the rain?
Sure why not. I bet it happened at some point. I like the rain, I like kissing only natural I kissed someone in the rain. Next question.
[Thirty-two] What are you thinking about right now?
Why am I filling out this asinine survey isn’t there a better use of my time. In addition to that I’m wondering about my expenses, thinking about my trip and questioning a lot of choices I’ve made recently.
[Thirty-three] What should you be doing?
Sleeping, writing or playing a game
[Thirty-four] What was the last thing that made you upset/angry?
Can we go with frustrated instead? Being asked to run a circuit to an electric despite the fact the theatre is out of cable longer than 10’ and I’d need enough to make a drop and if I use a bunch of smaller ones it’s not safe or a good idea so where can I pull 30’ of cable and right now out of my ass is not an option.
I made it work, somehow. But now I’m going to be expected to do it again sometime.
[Thirty-five] How often do you pray?
Heard something once that said something like for the faithful everything is prayer. While I don’t believe everything I do is an expression of prayer I do think that I pray more than I think I do. Then again there are times I do something risky and call out to something greater than myself (See #12)
[Thirty-six] Do you like working in the yard?
Not since it was a punishment as a kid.
[Thirty-seven] If you could have any last name in the world, what would you want?
How about I stick with mine, in someways is two last names depending on how I want it pronounced.
[Thirty-eight] Do you act differently around your crush?
I’d bet I do. Don’t want to admit I do but I do.
[Thirty-nine] Name one song that reminds you of an ex?
’Whoa Black Betty bam ba lam’ She better get it.
Dark Brown but lately I’ve been noticing some grey in it. I’m getting older and I’m not sure if that’s cool. Still have all my hair but getting older does present some problems. But if I’m getting older why am I still carded? Damn this baby face.
[Two] Where was your default picture taken?
Anjuné’s couch… I think. In fact I almost changed it just to spite her.
[Three] What's your middle name?
Benjamin
[Four] Your current relationship status?
odd at best
[Five] Does your crush like you back?
I think so, I’m not too sure. It feels like it but I don’t really know for sure.
[Six] What is your current mood?
Introspective going on drunk…well tipsy… not because of the introspective part but because I feel like it… I think. Jeez Can I try saying that without seeming like I have a substance abuse problem. I almost put I had a stressful week and that reads like something out of an AA handbook.
[Seven] What color underwear are you wearing?
Green I think, they might be blue… now I’m curious. Hang on a second. Nope Black.
I was way off
[Eight] What makes you happy?
When I make someone laugh, kind of lame, (admitted) but still it makes me feel good.
[Ten] If you could go back in time and change something, what would you change?
I alter the course of history and restore question 9 . A lame use of power I admit but I think it might be worth it. Instead I shall invent a 9
[Sal’s Nine] If you had to live without water or love which would it be?
Man could you take the Kelly Link out of the bathroom already. I realize ‘Water off a Black Dog’s Back’ is a good story but give it up. Put something else in there. I got an idea put the ‘Bukowski Reader’ in there then you can read about his life.
Dickass.
[Eleven] If you must be an animal for one day, what would you be?
Sloth? Yeah why not but like a more active sloth… or maybe a giant sloth I mean I’d be extinct but they were giant and sloth like. Regular Sloths are kind of cool in they’re own lazy way even if they don’t make use of those claws.
[Twelve] Ever had a near death experience?
I had an experience where I thought I should have a near death experience. I was changing some lighting stuff and had a pipe resting against the lift I was in, 20 feet in the air, and all the weight is against my lift’s bucket as I remove the shackle holding it to a rig point. At that moment I realize it’d be a great moment for me to have a near death experience.
But I didn’t.
[Thirteen] Was it because of something you do a lot?
No but I started wondering when I began taking risks like that.
[Fourteen] What's the name of the song stuck in your head right now?
The Gambler or Ana Ng but I’m going to say the Gambler to not be all nerd rock.
[Fifteen] Who did you copy and paste this from?
Anjuné
[Sixteen] Name someone with the same birthday as you?
Taisha we’re birthday buddies.
[Seventeen] When was the last time you cried?
I don’t know, a while ago.
[Eighteen] Have you ever sung in front of a large audience?
Yes, I played Nachum the beggar in DALO’s production of Fiddler on the Roof in Las Cruces, NM. That was back in ’03 I think. Nothing like being cast by the director asking if you wanted to be an inn keeper, book seller or beggar, what else can I do but choose the beggar.
[Nineteen] If you could have one super power what would it be?
Telepathy or this new one I proposed to my friend Bob which was the ability to affect probability.
[Twenty] What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Literally the first thing would be if they have all their arms and legs yeah after that it boils down to some other physical feature depending on how close I am. Vague yeah but I don’t want to admit that I judge people on superficial features and would rather say something like ‘eyes’ or ‘smile’ but I don’t know if that’s true each person in a new story… also hair color I notice that pretty fair up the list.
[Twenty-one] What do you usually order from starbucks?
Grande drip no room. On the rare occasion I feel experimental grande drip no room with a shot or four could be a shot in the dark, a red eye or something else like that but it’s the same kind of thing.
[Twenty-two] What's your biggest secret?
I’m not as calm and together as I’d like to believe I am.
[Twenty-three] Favorite color?
Green. Has been since I was a kid will be forever unless I get hit in the head, become color blind and forget what colors look like then I’ll say grey.
[Twenty-four] When was the last time you lied?
Today, don’t ask me what it was but I’m sure I lied today even if it was along the lines of ‘that’s not possible’ which was actually ‘I can’t do that in that amount of time’
[Twenty-five] Do you still watch kiddy movies or TV shows?
Duh, Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends is kick ass.
[Twenty-six] What are you eating or drinking at the moment?
Black Boss Porter, it is also kick ass.
[Twenty-seven] Do you speak any other language?
no but I know a few expression in Spanish
[Twenty-eight] What's your favorite smell?
Baking bread or the smell of salt water, put’em together and it’s awesome.
[Twenty-nine] If you could describe your life in one word what would it be?
Zen
[Thirty] When was the last time you gave/received a hug?
Last weekend.
[Thirty-one] Have you ever been kissed in the rain?
Sure why not. I bet it happened at some point. I like the rain, I like kissing only natural I kissed someone in the rain. Next question.
[Thirty-two] What are you thinking about right now?
Why am I filling out this asinine survey isn’t there a better use of my time. In addition to that I’m wondering about my expenses, thinking about my trip and questioning a lot of choices I’ve made recently.
[Thirty-three] What should you be doing?
Sleeping, writing or playing a game
[Thirty-four] What was the last thing that made you upset/angry?
Can we go with frustrated instead? Being asked to run a circuit to an electric despite the fact the theatre is out of cable longer than 10’ and I’d need enough to make a drop and if I use a bunch of smaller ones it’s not safe or a good idea so where can I pull 30’ of cable and right now out of my ass is not an option.
I made it work, somehow. But now I’m going to be expected to do it again sometime.
[Thirty-five] How often do you pray?
Heard something once that said something like for the faithful everything is prayer. While I don’t believe everything I do is an expression of prayer I do think that I pray more than I think I do. Then again there are times I do something risky and call out to something greater than myself (See #12)
[Thirty-six] Do you like working in the yard?
Not since it was a punishment as a kid.
[Thirty-seven] If you could have any last name in the world, what would you want?
How about I stick with mine, in someways is two last names depending on how I want it pronounced.
[Thirty-eight] Do you act differently around your crush?
I’d bet I do. Don’t want to admit I do but I do.
[Thirty-nine] Name one song that reminds you of an ex?
’Whoa Black Betty bam ba lam’ She better get it.
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